...... :)

So I saved these pictures to my desktop and I thought... What am I going to do with these? Might as well share these cool pictures on my blog :) So here you go.

I love batman...

Maybe one day we will all find our home

Six Word Memoirs By Alice Liddell

My lovely train of thought. (I'm so weird)

-Who am I going to marry?

-What will my wedding be like?

-How expensive do you think it will be?

-Will I wear my cowgirl boots?

-Will it be in a barn?

-It'll totally be in a barn.

-Will we have a lot of family and friends?

-Or will it be in the courthouse with only family?

-How many kids will we have?

-.........turtles...............

-Do we even want kids?

-Do we want them yet?

-What about now?

-Or even now?

-I want kids.

-Will we have a boy?

-Or all baby girls?

-Can we afford a house?

-Or do we live in an apartment for a while?

-Am I going to college when I/m married?

-Where am I going to college?

-Am I even going to college?

-Is he even going to be my boyfriend after this month?

-I know he asked my to marry him.. but I'm nervous.

-...(what about now?? nope, still no kids)...

-Will we have a car?

-I don't even know what I'm doing tomorrow.

-Or for spring break.

-Why am I so focused on the future when I should be living now.

-We said we are moving to the valley when I'm done with school.

-We'll live by my best friend so thats pretty cool.

-Maybe I will get used to the snow.

-I hate the snow.

-The snow makes me sad.

-I have depression.

-Did you know that?

-Nope. I wear a mask.

-Hapy little me!! :) 

-But really, there are good things to live for.

-like puppies.

-and grapes.

-and nutella (I LOOOVEEE nutella)

-and chocolate sprinkles from holland.

-and new phones.

-and new clothes.

-and OH my god.. new shoes.

-this bra itches..

-I gotta live because my birthday is in 2 weeks (yay!! Happy birthday me :)..) and I'm getting doubles. 

-I've always wanted those.

-life is great.

-Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end.

-Don't die. 

-You saw how everyone reacted when he almost died.

-Everyone loves you so stop being a freak.

-I want french fries.

-french fries make you fat. But you wanna know who cares???

-Not me!!

-Okay, seriously though... I'm going to go eat some french fries.

-and maybe some chocolate. 

-maybe both together.

I think there's supposed to be a title here?

He rubs his sweaty palms together as he slowly walks to the front of the room. He gets to the stand and clears his throat a few times. He can't rememeber the last time that swallowing was this hard. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. "For the past few days everytime I close my eyes I see his face in my mind," he mumbles, "but I don't look at the bad. I just remember all the fun times we had together. I rememeber the time we played with light sabers in the middle of the school hall way. I remember jumping on our beds and always making our mothers so mad. Do you remember that time that you came home, Sandy, and there was a big hole in the wall? We blamed it on Chris, but it was really Kaden and I. We were doing backflips off your stairs and he overshot it and hit the wall with his head." He gives a little chuckle and the corners of his mouth begin to turn up. "Sorry about that. I know he left us too soon and he was only 18... But I want everyone to remember all the good times we had with Kaden. He was close to all of you or else you wouldn't be here." He continues his talk and he tries to hold in the tears as he remembers all the fun they had together. He can't believe he lost his best friend like that, but he has to keep strong for his brother Chris. He needs to be his example and help the poor little guy out. He goes home and puts his spare change into the family savings jar. He knows its hard right now, but he needs to help his mom out. She's a single mother raising three teenage boys and a little girl. He realizes how hard it is for her to be working double shifts day in and day out. He offered to get a second job, but she knows how important school is and she won't let him give up his education to help her pay the bills. He climbs into bed with his little sister, Colette. He hugs her tight and asks her about her day. She tells him about the bullies at school and how they make fun of her clothes and her shoes. She tells him about how she has a solo in her dance and she really wishes her daddy could be there to see it. He kisses her forehead and whispers, "everything will be alright" in her ear. He tells her goodnight and leaves her room. He wishes he could help. A dad shouldn't just leave a little girl like that. He can handle, but she's only six... He doesn't understand why life has to be so hard sometimes. He wishes he could help his family, but he has problems of his own. He doesn't know what to do... He would usually go to Chris by now. Chris was his best friend and he was taken at only 18. He wishes that he could come back just for a day to tell him what to do. "Bravery runs in my family." He remembers his grandpas words as he holds back tears. He knows he needs to be strong, but he just doesn't remember how anymore. He feels like his whole world is crumbling and doesn't know how to help. He goes to work to try to keep his mind off of everything and to help his mom to pay some bills. He's been putting more money in that jar lately hoping that he can contribute to his moms hard work somehow. Working minimum wage jusst doesn't help very much and he doesn't know what to do. He just knows that he needs to breathe and move on with life. He's twenty eight now with a beautiful wife and two gorgeous baby girls. And not a day goes by that he isn't thinking about Chris. He still wears his cross around his neck even ten years after his passing to remind him that life is always too short to not be living it fully.

Oh just a few of my favorite things

DINOSAURS

BATMAN

HALLOWEEN

ALICE IN WONDERLAND

I Think He Has Lost It

He wakes up, thinking today is just a normal day. Pulls on that old blue work shirt and rubs his eyes to wash away the sand from the sleeping man. Little did he know that his phone would ring and change his whole life. The voice on the other line tells him his cousin is dead...a suicide from heroin overdose. 

He's losing his mind, but he has to keep himself together, he has work. He walks into work, and everyone is staring at him. "You don't look so good," they say. He wants to scream. No shit, I don't look so good! He wants to yell at them, but he knows they don't know the news. He can't do this. His boss calls him into her office. "I need the day off tomorrow, I have a funeral to go to." She doesn't ask and he doesn't tell her as tears fill his swollen eyes. He's losing it more and more, he can't keep this up for long. She tells him to just go home. He leaves as fast as he can, running all the way to his garage.

He goes inside and smokes a bowl hoping that will ease his pain. He cried as his sadness slowly shifts to anger. "He was SIXTEEN!" he yells, "God damn it! He was too young!" He yells as he cracks open a can of beer. He just doesn't care anymore. His girlfriend is worried about him, and he doesn't care. He just drinks one beer after another. How many has he had now? He tries to recall, but he lost track after the eleventh one. His mom yells at him. She tells him her cousin was a piece of shit anyways and that he's just drowning his life in alcohol.

 He needs to fight. He aches for a fight. He calls his buddy and they go to their old fight club. Everyone here knows how he fights and no one dares fight him at a time like this. He needs a fight; he is going to go crazy. Some brave soul volunteers and thinks he can beat him. They get in the ring and he doesn't care anymore. He throws the first punch and after that he is gone. He doesn't remember much of the fight. All he sees is blood and the kid is on the floor. He begins to panic... but he notices his breathing. Good, he's still alive. The kid was new, but he still should have known not to fight him. Once he gets hit in the face he's gone. He blacks out and loses it, demolishing anything in his way. Everyone knows not to hit him in the face.

He gets a ride home and goes straight for the fridge. His hands start to ache as he opens another beer. He wants to be numb and this is the only way he knows how to get rid of the pain. He takes some sleeping pills as he finishes the can. He gets into bed hoping to sleep the pain away.

His girlfriend is starting to worry. She doesn't know how he is going to handle all of this. She's texted him and called him, but has gotten no reply. She is starting to freak out. The last thing she got from him was a simple text saying, "I'm fighting tonight." She begged him not to, but still no reply. She knows how he gets and she made him promise he wouldn't fight anymore, but he went fighting. This made her worry so much. It's been fourteen hours and she has no reply. She is starting to fear the worst. He could be in the hospital.. or jail.. or he could be dead.. She remembers all the promises he made her. She can hear them clear in her head. The promise of their marriage and their little baby girl. She knew it was all too good to be true. She bites her lip as she stresses herself out... and he doesn't care. She thinks about the time they went to the mall to look for baby clothes. She thinks about the time they went to Ogden to look at wedding rings. She told him she was too young. Why did she have to tell him that? She doesn't know if he is okay... She worries that this could be the end and she ruined it all. She worries that he could be dead and the only reason she didn't marry him was because she was... "too young.." She always hopes for the future, but with him.. She never knows. She cries in her room, unsure of his safety.

He wakes up from a million texts from her, but he doesn't care. He turns off his phone and grabs another beer. She is starting to worry and he doesn't care. He gets in his truck and starts to drive. He knows he doesn't have a license and he's not good at driving angry. He doesn't care though. Why should he care? He drives as fast as he can. He doesn't know where he is going and he doesn't care. He screams and loses himself in another beer. He is so done with everything... and he doesn't even care. I think he has lost it.. and he doesn't feel a thing. 

To be continued...

Okay I've always wanted to write this down somewhere and I never have yet... SO I might as well do it here.

My Bucket List

 -Go skydiving (because lets be original..)
-Eat unique food
`Go to an aquarium 
-Go to Italy
-Go to France
-Go to Germany (Auschwitz to be specific)
-Work somewhere thats not fast food
-Have a baby girl
-Go to Cedar Point
-Go on a vacation with my best friend
XX-Go to the circus
-Learn to not hate food
XX-Get roses from a boy
-Get a promise ring from a boy
-Get married
XX-Dye my hair crazy colors
-Get a tattoo
-See Banksy's work in real life
-Go scuba diving
-Kiss someone on the top of a farris wheel
-Play messy twister
-Watch all of Johnny Depp's movies
-Live somewhere warm, like California or Florida
-Go skinny dipping
XX-Go on a road trip with my best friends
-Find my dream job
-Splatter colorful paint all over my walls
-Watch the new years ball drop in New York
-Go to New York
XX-Go to Hawaii
-Have a secret room in my house
-Go surfing (learn how to go surfing)
-Make a scrapbook
-Party on a yacht
-Stop over analyzing everything
-Be a cheerleader for a day
-Get a real letter in the mail
-Get a massage
-Go to an airport and get a ticket for the next flight out
-Free my heart from hatred
-Go to a Tickle Me Pink concert
-Meet the band members of Tickle Me Pink
-Carve our initials in a tree
XX-Lay on the road in the middle of the night 
-Swim with dolphins
XX-Go to a drive-in movie
-Go on a cruise
-Visit the Carribean (act like pirates?)
-Help him open his own restaurant 
-Buy the person behind me's food
-Give a homeless man a lot of money/food
-Maybe find religion? Or at least peace
-Type a love letter on a type writter
-Pay for my parents to go on vacation
-Go to the superbowl
-Go clubbing
-Celebrate in Vegas
-Have a 50th wedding anniversary
-Watch every Disney movie
-Say yes to everything for a day
-Be an awesome parent
-Go to the Buckingham Palace
XX-Be someones reason for smiling
-Go a week without electronics
-Exercise for a month straight (at least)
-See the Golden Gate Bridge (walk across it)
-Smash a pie in someone;s face
-See the Great Pyramids of Giza
-Go to the Grand Canyon
-Fly in a helicopter
-Fly in a personal plane/jet
-Ride an elephant
-See the Eiffel Tower
-Have a party like in Project X (at least go to one)
-Make myself have more fun in life
-Pet a seal
-Visit all 50 states
-Go see the worlds biggest ball of yarn
-Be a preschool teacher (or volunteer at a preschool)
-Take a zumba class
-Quit drinking soda (I can wait for this one :P)
-Try new foods
-Stop hating food
XX-Sleep on the tramp
-Leave a really big tip when I go out to eat
XX-Run a 5k
-Go shopping and not care how much I spend
-Stay at a really nice hotel in Vegas
-Go to outerspace
-Do those test drills at NASA
-Climb a water tower
-Have really white teeth
XX-Go to bed and wake up to him
-Take poloroid pictures with the guy I like
-Have a flour fight (and any other food item on the counter)
-Leave this town
-Move out
-Live somewhere that doesn't have a predominant religion
-Live somewhere where people don't question mu beliefs and lack of them
-Be good at something artistic I do
-Save up $10,000
XX-Learn another language
-Own a mustang
-Own a Ford '69 Ranger
-Take his last name as my own
-Stay at a bed and breakfast
-Toilet Paper someones house
-Do something illegal, and get away with it
-Graffiti something
-Make a harlem shake video
-Have a house with a dance studio in it
-Never stop dancing
-Try vodka gummy bears
-Drink alcohol
XX-Do a backflip
-Graduate Highschool
-Finish an online class
-Go tanning at a tanning salon
-Get the perfect tan from the sun
XX-Get acrylic nails
-Have gorgeous hair
-Wear a bikini on the beach
-Go shopping in California
-Go shopping in New York
XX-Have a silly string fight
-Have a six pack (or really good abs)
-Not care about my weight
-Have a wedding reception in a barn
-Wear cowboy boots under my wedding dress
XX-Watch a volcano erupt
-Be really good at glowsticking
XX-Get hair extensions
-Go to Warped Tour
-Create something I've pinned on pinterest
-Explore a shipwreck
XX-Collect glass bottles
XX-Get really nice, expensive perfume
-Get my belly button pierced
-Get double piercings in my earlobes
-Get a cartlige piercing at the top of my ear
-Play hide an seek ain Ikea
XX-Act like I'm married in the Ikea showrooms
XX-Have a New Years kiss
-Write a letter to myself and open it in 10 years
-Have a mud fight
-Go on a moonlit walk with someone
XX-Sneak out 
-Go to a ball
XX-Volunteer at a soup kitchen
XX-Go to a different religion's church
-See the Northern Lights



-To be continued...

P.S. here are a few of my favorite quotes about life.